Well that was morbid.

Forgive me if this post is somewhat rattled and disjointed, I read Frankenstein earlier today and it was quite unnerving. Good, but unnerving. Nonetheless, if you frequent this blog you will by now have become an expert in deciphering rattled and disjointed posts, as they somehow find their way here more often than not. Well now. Shall we begin?

I had to omit two topics from my last post because I had classes to prepare for, so I think its appropriate to tackle them now. One of them has to do solely with me, whereas the other has to do only partially with me. In think we'll save the best for last and start with the former. You already know that it has to do with me, but it more particularly has to do with my triathlon stuff. Guys, I finally sat down and talked to the running coach that I've been trying to work something out with for almost a year now. Phew! I'm going to start training with a local high school's cross-country team that the coach coaches. It's going to be great. I'm finally going to be able to really run!

The later topic has to do with friends and grudges. You see, two nights ago I was walking home with a friend, who from now on will be referred to as Nemo, and we had this interesting heart-to-heart conversation. It was really nice. Nemo hadn't opened up like that to me for quite awhile, and I had had the feeling that we weren't, as of late, exactly seeing eye to eye. Nemo told me about grudges that he had harbored for years. Anyway. We talked until my dad came out looking for his son, who should have been home 45 min. ago, and picked me up. We talked about a lot of stuff and I hope I was a good friend for him and helped to warm him up. The idea of holding a grudge, though, is pretty foreign to me. I mean, sure, every once in awhile I get majorly annoyed with someone, but its usually forgotten by the time I go to bed. People say things to me that might hurt other people, but I laugh them off. I've always had the mentality that the only way people can hurt me is if I let them. I guess you could say I have a tough shell.

Now, believe it or not, I actually have a reason for bringing all this up. In talking and thinking about grudges with Nemo, a thought dawned on me that hadn't previously fully occurred to me. In the previous paragraph it probably seemed like I was lauding and harping on the fact that I don't hold grudges; that I was insensitive to the hurtful things people do and say to me. And it can be good. But like most things, I realized that it, too, has a flip side. It occurred to me that my being insensitive to myself could potentially lead me to being insensitive to others. Maybe I do or say things that I would take as a lighthearted joke, or even a sort of twisted sign of affection, that others could take offence at and even be hurt by. I hope that's the cause of most of the meanness in the world and that most people aren't actually trying to be hurtful when they are.  Anyway. Food for thought. I have to go swim.

TTFN.

-Thomas